Forum:What Is Your Opinion On The Story Serial?

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Forums: Index > Onion Complex > What Is Your Opinion On The Story Serial?

This is a page to ask, what is your opinion on the story serial on the main page? Please provide, comments, questions, or suggestions! Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)

I'm likening it, tho it hasn't been updated in a wile... with the form of writing, I'm stuck with ver. 1 and 2. Also, seeing that I want to be an author some day, I'd love to help with the story. Just know I have a Fanfiction account and mite be mainly working on my stories on there. Thanks for reading! ~User:ZoltCat

I like where it's headed, but it hasn't been updated in a while... Also, another thing you may want to look at is the grammar — you should be sure to capitalize all proper nouns, use apostrophes/commas when needed, and any other form of spelling and punctuation. I'm sorry to be so persnickety about this, but I just... well, you know... yeah. :P ~PikFan23 (Admin)
I get it. This is on the main page, and we want to treat it to represent the wiki well. I will try to update every Sunday, but I might not always succeed. Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop) 09:02, 2 June 2013 (EDT)

It has just been updated! Please tell me what you think of the Emperor Bulblax returning from Pikmin 1! Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop) 14:00, 2 June 2013 (EDT)

The Emperor Bulblax... resurrected...? O_o Nooo... *grabs Purples*
Okay, back to seriousness. This is an interesting twist: the Bulblax returning from the end of Pikmin, and thinking that Sagittarius is Olimar. What I find more striking is that it came back! This is my theory: either the Intelligence took the Emperor Bulblax's corpse and allowed its consciousness to return to it, or the Intelligence found a similarly-looking body and had the Emperor Bulblax's consciousness go into it. Note that these are my theories.
Also, a little trivia: in the British television program Doctor Who, there is an evil character that has no physical form and is named the Great Intelligence. Coincidence? ~PikFan23 (Admin)
That is indeed a complete coincidence. I have never seen Doctor Who and I am not even entirely sure what it is about (some time traveling doctor). I was thinking that The Intelligence found the Emperor Bulblax's body and started the life processes again. Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)
I see. Anyway, Doctor Who is a British television show which revolves around the Doctor, who travels through time and space by using a blue police box known as the TARDIS (Time And Relevant Dimensions In Space), and goes on many adventures with his companions. It's a sci-fi show, and it's really cool. ~PikFan23 (Admin)

Hmm. Sounds interesting. Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)

I like it[edit]

I like where the story is going. Please make more entries soon! ThePikminMeister'sCat.jpg Hello. This is ThePikminMeister, the Cat-Loving Pikmin Fan!

I will try to update every Sunday. Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)

What Do You Like Best?[edit]

I am kind of stuck. The current story is supposed to be from Louie's point of view with him talking to himself/his pet. However, I am finding this difficult to write. Here are several writing styles, please tell me which one you think would be best for the story serial:

(1) The fashion that I used for the first story: Louie rode his Gatling Groink in silence. At least, that's how it appeared. In reality, he was telepathically communicating with it. Not that the Groink had much to say. It didn't have the comprehension for words with more than five letters.

This felt dangerous. Louie tensed, feeling that he was being snuck upon. He signaled the Gatling Groink, and it immediately whirled around to catch prey.

Louie was terribly disappointed to see it was only a Sheargrub.

(2) The fashion I have used for the second story, this is more difficult for me but if you like it better I will continue to use it in the current story.: Groink, you are dumb. You can't even spell words with more than five letters!

I can too! L-E-T-U-R-S. See?

Wait, I hear something! Turn around, Groink, and catch him off guard!

Tsk, only a Sheargrub? Pathetic.

(3) This is something I am contemplating doing.: Dere Olumar: Life is prety hard rite nowe. My Grink is dum, he cant evan spel "leturs".

I herd somthin todae, but it ternd owt to only be a shargrub. Luv, Lui

And those are the choices. If you have a suggested style, please say so. Otherwise, please just pick which one of these looks good to you. Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)

I know this isnt that helpful, but i just say either the first or the third. First has priorority. Ragnorok X 23:46, 28 June 2015 (EDT)

This story was finished months ago... ~PikFan23 (Admin) 06:57, 29 June 2015 (EDT)

New Story[edit]

Ok, so I've got a story going offline, and I think it's going pretty well. It's about what happens to the Pikmin after the events of the three canon games. Here's the prologue. I'll post Chapter 1 this Saturday, as per the Story Serial rules. Also, I cleaned up that page and archived each story so the page wouldn't get embarrassingly long. So yeah, comments, questions? I'd appreciate input! Thanks everybody! ~PikFan23 (Admin)

Hey guys! I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for the delay. I'm not dead, neither is the story. But I've been having issues writing the second chapter, because I want it to be of decent quality and length. I'm aiming for ~2k words or more per chapter, because ambition. Seriously though, I want this story to be long, because I want people to have something to read. (Not saying your stories are bad, Peach Bulborb, they were just short.) Anyway, just keep in mind that I'm still writing it. No promises, but it should be out this Saturday or the next. Sooner, hopefully... ~PikFan23 (Admin)

I think that its great you decided to write a story, and so far it seems pretty good. You definitely added a nice little thing with the idea of infinite space in the onion (granted, we always knew something like that had to exist, or Pikmin had to have living conditions like sardines). I am excited to see how the serial continues! BTW, the whole Saturday post thing, "they're more like guidelines than actual rules". Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)
Thanks. The Onion's interior isn't infinite, per se, but it's still pretty big inside. Its structure will be explained in-depth in Chapter 2, appropriately named "Exploration". Also, it kinda seemed like post on Saturday thing was a rule, but good to know it's just a guideline. Still working on it! ~PikFan23 (Admin)
Nice job on the latest episode! I really like how you envisioned the interior of the Onion. The new episode did kinda take a long time, but I totally understand... it's hard to keep dedicated for months on end! Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)

Cool story (internal groan about cliffhangers). I personally enjoyed the little fight between Amber and Ignis! Tanbulborb.pngI'm Peach Bulborb, and I approve all grub dogs. (Sysop)

I really like it! How the Onion works is neat, and the name Ignis fits with "fire" without being something predictable like "Flame" or "Flare" or "Ember" It's good and I like it! User:StarWolf/sig

Peach Bulborb: I decided to do a cliffhanger to build suspense, but I get your disappointment. I also felt like it was a nice place to stop, since the chapter would have been 5k+ words had I included the battle. But yeah, thanks for the input, guys! ~PikFan23 (Admin) 20:37, 29 June 2015 (EDT)

PikFan23: Can You Continue The Story Mysterious World? Dredbulborb.jpg Apprentice Red Bulborb LoganPikmin

I'm still working on it, no worries. It's just taking a while because I'm not sure how to set up the battle with the Tree Snagret. I don't know when I'll get it done, but keep in mind that I'm still working on it! ~PikFan23 (Admin) 15:50, 17 August 2015 (EDT)

The Tree Snagret could be winning, then defeated by another kind of Pikmin? I think that's a good idea, but then again, I made it. — Picturess.jpg I'm Pikminfan27, and I approve all fangames.

That actually is a good idea. I'll consider it! I've been meaning to introduce another Pikmin type, but what with the whole introduction thing... Well, I'll come up with some sort of surprise, that's for sure. To everybody in general: I have no excuse why this is late. I'm just being lazy. So hopefully, I'll get off my butt and start writing again. Also, I've started hosting this over at, because already it's pretty long and I needed somewhere else to host it. Just a heads up. Sorry it's taking forever! ~PikFan23 (Admin) 17:45, 25 September 2015 (EDT)

I LOVE the new chapter! Winged Pikmin are my favorite type! I have an idea! How about you do a new Pikmin type every 5 chapters? (I want to make my own story, but I'm not very good...) Make the story into a fangame! — Picturess.jpg I'm Pikminfan27, and I approve all fangames.

Thank you! I'm actually going to introduce another Pikmin type very soon, probably in a couple chapters at the earliest. As for which type... well, we'll see! Also, sorry, but I don't feel like making a fangame version of it. Though, Ragnorok X tried making his own adaptation of it a while back but it never really got anywhere... If you'd like, you can make your own adaptation of it. Just be sure to credit me and stuff like that. Thanks! ~PikFan23 (Admin) 04:39, 1 January 2016 (EST)

Hey anonymous user here Love the story and think that 1 Winged Pikmin needs elem and the Red Ignus saved should be named and be more important.Pikifan4 14:19, 14 January 2016 (EST)

Thanks, anon. Winged Pikmin will be getting Elem for sure, don't worry about that. At least one of each type will have Elem. Also, about the unnamed Pikmin, I wanted it to develop Ignis's personality a bit. I wanted to show that Ignis cares about everybody, even if he doesn't know them that well, which is an important part of his personality. So...yeah. (Also remember to use ~~~~ when you sign, thanks.) ~PikFan23 (Admin) 19:46, 6 January 2016 (EST)

Hey same anonymous user good and will there be more than 1 important Winged pikmin? Pikifan4 14:19, 14 January 2016 (EST)

Sorry everyone, but I'm canceling this story. Not many people cared about it and I tried to get older, more "professional" users to look at it but they weren't very impressed. (Except for Scruffy, who was really the main driving force behind all this. Sorry Scruffy...) So yeah, this story's done and over. But I don't think you'll really miss it much, especially cause I only updated every half year. I don't really see the point anymore. There was very low interest. So I'm just going to let this fade into oblivion. ...Oh wait, it already has. Heh. Oh well. I'll just come up with a new story at some point, hopefully that one will be more interesting and appealing. Anyway, have a nice day. ~PikFan23 (Admin) 20:09, 23 May 2016 (EDT)

Could one of the other users continue it, then? — Picturess.jpg I'm Pikminfan27, and I approve all fangames.

I'm not entirely comfortable with my story being continued by someone else. My story would go in a much different direction than I would intend it to, and that doesn't sit too well with me. But because of my uncertainty, I might let someone else continue it later if I feel like it. So for the time being, I'm just going to say no. Ask me again in a few months and I'll give you my final answer then. ~PikFan23 (Admin) 00:23, 31 May 2016 (EDT)

In these multiple months, I've been thinking about it and I decided that you could e-mail (because there's no form of private message on the wiki) one of us, with the plot as an attachment, and whoever you e-mailed could continue the story. Then, you wouldn't have to use up time on the story but it would still continue. — Picturess.jpg I'm Pikminfan27, and I approve all fangames.


NOOOOO!!!!! — I am LoganPikmin and meet my friend Spike Pikmin by Scruffy.png Spiky the Spike Pikmin.

Yeah, Mysterious World was pretty interesting, its too bad it had to be cancelled :| — DiamondSpiderRender.png This message was approved by Neocraftz1553

Only reason I i'm doing anything Pikmin wise anymore, to see if it had a new chapther or 2..... Pikifan4 13:02, 22 June 2016 (EDT)